Haste
The Mercury Lift (Century Media)
by Ewan Wadharmi
Like the 800 or so other bands that sound exactly like them, Haste mixes hardcore Rage spewing with syrupy boy-band regressions. What will separate them are the tag-team vocals, which bridge that awkward too cool for Backstreet Boys/not cool enough for Coalesce stage. Haste’s largest strength lies in inventing golden titles for shitty songs. “Houdini Has Lost His Key” features sickening sweety-pie vocals. Offset drum beats trip over themselves just in case the overstretched phrasing fails to cripple the song. The “melodies” promised in the media packet consist of aimless wandering around three or four notes per tune.
My theory is that once the kids abandoned the archaic practice of rhyming, the tune followed soon after. Sure, it’s an old-fangled Dr. Seuss structured ritual, but rhyme gave the phrase something to shoot for. A frame of reference within the rhythm. And for God’s sake, let’s hold onto the rhythm ’til they pry it from our cold, dead fingers.
(2323 W. El Segundo Blvd. Hawthorne, CA 90250)