Return to the Foreign Legion (Zap)
by Jon Sarre
The publicist claims that this release from the vanity project of an MTV employee and art ghoul, whose name, coincidentally, is the same (tho’ spelled differently) as the main character of Kurt Vonnegut’s Breakfast of Champions is “on the verge of breaking across the country.” Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Duane Hoover and the other two guys who call themselves the Insects aren’t really bad (which probably seals their fate, since they can’t possibly be shitty and bland enough to crack Billboard‘s Hot 100). Thing is, they play not-very-interesting mid-tempo rock with a halfway decent sense of hooks and frequent obliging nods to Lennon/McCartney, Lou Reed, and Tom Verlaine.
I guess the producer thinks this record sounds like Keith Richards’ first solo album. Ha ha ha ha ha. Granted, that’s much better than comparing Return to the Foreign Legion to Ron Wood or Bill Wyman’s debut lonesome efforts, but in the scheme of Essential Listening, “Rolling Stones Solo Records” fall somewhere between the Broadway cast album of that musical Paul Simon tried to pull off a little while ago and the last thing the Doors cut – you know, without Jim Morrison, cuz he either O.D.’ed or faked his death so he could get off watching stoned kids deface Parisian cemeteries.
(PO Box 808 Seal Beach, CA 90740)