Euroboys

1999 Man (Man’s Ruin)
by Jon Sarre

So who woulda thunk that the axe-grinder from Turbonegro (Kurt “Euroboy” Schreiner) and the drummer from Gluecifer (Anders Moeller) would get together and wind up concocting a maryjane-hazed soft-core porno soundtrack, y’know, like somethin’ Mancini (who’s actually name-dropped in the Man’s Ruin “info” blurb tacked onto the back of 1999 Man) woulda done to raise some quick hush-money to pay-off some blue-flick floozie, cuz he knocked her up high on highballs and ‘scription meds and hadta get her a scrape and shut her the hell up, in short, easy-listenin’ for stoners?

Actually, it’s kinda an interestin’ change of pace (for the first ten minutes or so), havin’ heard Turbonegro and havin’ been told Euro Boys were “good” (without bein’ informed why or how). ‘Fore throwin’ this stuff on, I was expectin’ the Loud! Fast! Heavy! ScanRock action that just about every other reindeer rocker over there does. The closest thing to that (and it ain’t even that close) is the first track on 1999 Man cuz it has this vaguely classic-rock soundin’ riff, tho’ by second listen, it’s pretty much “Detachable Penis” by King Missile, dressed up with farfisa, Bowiesque vocals and “Funky Drummer” breakdowns. Other than that, Euro Boys are sublime masters of long, cheezy, (mostly) instrumental, uh, Euro post-disco lounge musak, that’s sometimes Blacksploitation (“Gallery Oslo”), sometime Spanish horn-y (“Rock’N’Roll Farmacia”). It’s perfect for early-on-Sunday-mornings or sumptin’ else mellow… so long as the bong’s primed. I guess.
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