Size 14

(Volcano)
by Katy Shea

The cardboard CD case smelled like cucumbers and from the moment I opened it, all was cool (get it… “as a cucumber..,” ah, forget it). Size 14 offers up some rockin’ guitar heavy goofy pop – reminiscent of Weezer or even Devo, while still touching upon some harder-edged influences (especially ’80s heavy metal-style guitar solos). What can I say? They pull it all together really well. Lead singer Linus (aka Kevin Dotson) is like Billy Corgan except with a realistic self- image. The intensity is there, but you just like him waaaaaaaaay more. The lyrics are witty without being pretentious or annoying, the sound is hard but never overly loud/noisy (if there is such a thing) and the man writes some damned infectious pop! It seems this music can’t possibly alienate anyone. The song titles read like a list of Kids in The Hall sketches: “Death Metal Steve,” “People Get Really Drunk in Las Vegas,” and my pick of the album, the epic “I Touched Her Ass.” The hidden track (after the last song) is totally hilarious… I’ll let you find out for yourself. What sets these fine California fellows apart from the Weezer-esque genre from whence they derive their sound is their depth. Lyrically and musically Size 14 (the name is taken from Linus’ impressive shoe size… uh, no comment) transcends the levity of their topics and the consistent catchiness of their melodies to arrive at a place beyond unconscious head bobbing and more on par with things like empathy, synchronicity, humor and compassion. This band is a real find, combining all the essential elements of good pop – inventiveness, wit, melody, harmony a little sugar in a recipe that rocks and well… smells like cucumbers. Buy it, eat it, love it.