A Spy, A Jedi, and An American Pie
The 1999 Summer Movie Review
by Christian T. Escobar
Sometime around Christmas, when the theaters are filled with Oscar contenders and Holiday fare, previews shown before these films usually end with the two syllable word every film buff longs to hear: SUMMER. Summertime is when Hollywood pulls out all the stops to entertain the masses with big-time pictures, the emphasis being on big-time. Any self-respecting film buff knows full well that summertime does not bring the promise of quality, instead offering quantity, which can be just as nice. This summer, the last one of the century, actually got off to an early start with Keanu Reeves’ subtextual video game-esque The Matrix carrying over from Springtime (also known as the Dry Spell in Movieland). What The Matrix proved was that science fiction still rules at the box office and even though the movie had a totem pole in the lead role, it became quite a success. But this electronica fairy-tale head-trip was quickly pushed aside as it was in the path of one of the most anticipated motion pictures in history.
Though a few movies officially kicked off the blockbuster season in the preceding weeks, Memorial Day belonged to George Lucas and Star Wars, Episode One: The Phantom Menace. The hype was extraordinary with merchandising and coverage presented at an almost blinding pace. Then came Jar Jar Binks. If ever there was a moment stopper in film history, it was this computer generated, racially questionable, unintelligible character from The Phantom Menace. Forget the long theater lines, the tremendous special effects and the continuation of one of Hollywood’s most revered fables… Jar Jar was what everyone wanted to talk about. For me, he was just the unsavory icing on an already bland-tasting cake that George Lucas had thrown to the film-going nation. Soon everyone was selling the tie-in merchandise for half price and the theaters eventually dwindled after the film took money from pretty much every breathing human being on the planet. But does anyone remember the light saber battles? Or the pod race? No, everyone is still stung by the presence of Jar Jar Binks.
Could any film challenge the Star Wars juggernaut? Well, in a word, no. Previously released action films tried, such as ludicrous and banal updated versions of The Mummy and Entrapment, which only attracted an audience because the television commercials spent thirty seconds examining the perfect shape of Catherine Zeta-Jones’ ass. These films were washed away effortlessly by the Jedi spectacular. What could stop Star Wars? Would you guess an Englishman with bad teeth?
The first Austin Powers did okay numbers at the box office, but like any classic comedy it gained its audience on video with powerful word of mouth letting everyone know that Mike Myers still had some comedy left in him. The sequel decided to take Star Wars on headfirst, and Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me actually managed to hold its own, taking in profit as far as the eye could see. Of course, the film was essentially a retread of the first, but the sequel had a secret weapon in the shape of a man two feet tall. Mini-Me (a miniature Dr. Evil clone) became the rage of mid-summer and soon everyone was talking about the dwarf with a vicious bite and slick dance moves.
The big bang created by the spies and Jedi left a wake for considerably less-hyped films to take center stage. Perhaps the best film of the summer (and maybe the year), Election, with Reese Witherspoon and Matthew Broderick soaked up all the critical attention with its sly, witty look at American politics from the point of view of a High School Presidential election. It was one of the few good reasons to visit the theaters this summer. Comedies were aplenty with Hugh Grant hopping into another one of his custom made Brit vehicles. Notting Hill also starred Julia Roberts (smartly sticking to light-hearted roles these days), and while it doesn’t quite live up to Four Weddings and a Funeral standards, it did have one of the funnier supporting characters of the year. Instinct wasn’t all that funny, but then again, it wasn’t meant to be. Starring perennial Oscar star Anthony Hopkins as a modern day Tarzan and Cuba Gooding Jr. as his would-be savior, this picture never amounted to much despite its heavy-duty billing. And speaking of Tarzan… Disney made its foray into the summer scrape with a slick new adaptation on the classic tale of Tarzan. Disney could never stay on the roll that begin with The Lion King a few years back, and this time was no exception. It’s a terrific retelling of the story, but it didn’t capture that Disney magic.
The arthouse had a pretty decent summer that kicked off a bit early with Robert Altman’s small but delightful Cookie’s Fortune and continued with the feminine powerhouse Tea With Mussolini. A couple of plays were adapted for the screen, one from an old time master of dialogue and one from a contemporary conversational wizard. An Ideal Husband, based on Oscar Wilde’s witty stage piece, stars the affable and handsome Rupert Everett in the lead role. The Winslow Boy, David Mamet’s adaptation of Terence Rattigan’s, was not nearly as funny or interesting as An Ideal Husband, but still had that Mamet magic.
It seems like it wouldn’t be summer without a Will Smith blockbuster waiting for us at the theater. Ahh, but the fates can be cruel and Big Willie suffered a body blow as his picture Wild Wild West took a beating at the box office. Audiences aren’t stupid and no matter how much they love The Fresh Prince, nobody wants to see a piece of shit regardless of how pretty it may look. Instead, the kids flocked to Adam Sandler’s newest display of adult immaturity: Big Daddy. Okay, its silly and the kid is so sweet it makes you sick, but it was funny when it counted and that is all that matters, right? And in the just a little too late category falls the South Park picture. Wildly crude and disgusting (and funny), had this picture been released last summer, it would’ve been a blockbuster. But the comedy of the summer may’ve been the politically hot American Pie. Controversial because of its marketing campaign, this R-rated marvel of debauchery was worth every penny of the price of admission. Adult thrillers took up a lot of seating this summer with John Travolta’s novelesque The General’s Daughter bringing in all the middle-aged married couples on Sunday afternoon. A capable potboiler with a fairly predictable plot, it actually managed to make some box office bananas. Unfortunately, the same can’t be said for Spike Lee’s controversial Summer of Sam, which was just as bad as everyone said it was. An unfocused story with little going for it other than a talking dog, one wonders if Spike may be losing his abilities. Of course, the thriller everyone was waiting for was Stanley Kubrick’s much-delayed, ultra-secret, rumor machine Eyes Wide Shut. When all was said and done, Eyes Wide Shut wasn’t much to talk about, with Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman playing a b-movie game of jealousy and obsession that is well below Kubrick’s standards. It’s long, dull, and full of scenes that are borderline absurd. In essence, it was the disappointment of the year.
Perhaps the two films that represent what is right and wrong with Hollywood today were released near the end of the summer blockbuster season. Dreamworks was letting the money ride on the PG-13 horror picture/remake The Haunting, while a small studio snatched up and released a horror-mockumentary made for about $35,000 by the name of The Blair Witch Project. The former was a catastrophe, starring a few almost-A-list actors, Dreamworks (the epitome of “Hollywood”) should be ashamed for releasing this piece of trash. However, the saving grace of the summer has to be Blair Witch and its ingenious take on a genre that has become silly and unoriginal. With camcorder footage, a perfectly designed marketing campaign, and a radically absorbing website, Blair Witch redefines the modern horror picture, bringing imagination into the fold. This motion picture is a godsend in a very bad crop of movies.
Yes, that’s right, 1999 was a pathetic summer for movies with the bad far outweighing the good. In fact, most of the films weren’t even mediocre, they were worse. Sure, the summer season opened up in Death Star-exploding fashion, but in the end, not even The Phantom Menace seems memorable enough to save this season from the dumpster. Outside of a few blips on the radar (Austin Powers, Blair Witch, Election, and American Pie) the last summer of the century proved to be something short of shagadelic, baby.
