Lollipop Magazine

The Culture Bunker – Thirteenth Night, or Whatever You Say: Act 2 – Fiction

May 1, 1997

Rut: Shut thine pie-hole, Trichinosis! My lord is dying and so art thou, thou underrehearsed beverage- referencing knave! Take heed! Take two, they’re small.

Sometimes I Wonder – Fiction

May 1, 1997

I woke up early to get a head start on the day, but it had already started. Time passed. In the fast lane, no less, and I was left choking on its dust.

The Culture Bunker – Obscurity Minus 14:59 And Counting – Fiction

February 1, 1997

I knew it was coming to me, so I had to do it right. I sprung into action immediately, sustaining only mild facial contusions when I slammed into the wall.

The Culture Bunker – If The Benefits, Wear It – Fiction

November 1, 1996

I was line-dancing to techno, starting a one-man mosh pit, doing the Bulgarian Hustle… I was out of control. Guys in Morrissey shirts beat the crap out of me.

The Culture Bunker – Fiction

September 1, 1996

Observe the complete rundown of the work required to complete an average Culture Bunker…

The Culture Bunker – Fiction

March 1, 1996

I was relaxing in my hyperbolic chamber, when, through the triple-density Perplexiglas and clogged whimsy filter, I heard a muffled knock at my door.

The Culture Bunker – Fiction

February 1, 1996

The Royal Shakespeare and Traveling Wet-Nurse Repertory Theatre has mounted a series of the Bard’s greatest works, subtly rewritten for the adult market.

The Culture Bunker – Fiction

December 1, 1995

Virgil is gone. So is my illegitimate brother, Sliced. His absence is like a gaping void where once there was a void that didn’t gape nearly as much.

The Culture Bunker – Fiction

November 1, 1995

Dex has been stockpiling assault weapons and yellow highlighting pens, preparing us for the Day of the Final Draft.

The Culture Bunker – Fiction

October 1, 1995

I am running out of time to write the Great American Youth-Angst Novel. So, I put all of my protruding organs to their respective grindstones.