Lollipop Magazine

Sing, Tweedy-bird, Sing! – An “interview” with Wilco’s Jeff Tweedy – Fiction

January 3, 2003

World Famous Music/Film/Theatre/Fashion/ Media Critic Jean-Paul Bavard met recently with Jeff Tweedy of Wilco for an exclusive interview, in which they discussed Wilco’s music, the recently released film about them, struggles with their previous label, and the pressures of fame.

The Night I Died – BANG BANG BANG – Chapter four – Fiction

November 8, 2002

So I stand there, and they sit there, and we all look at each other until I can’t take it anymore, so I shoot the man in the wheelchair in the shin, which I guess has no real effect except it gets him talking.

Ozz-fête – An “interview” with Ozzy Osbourne – Fiction

November 8, 2002

World famous music/fashion/theatre/ film critic Jean-Paul Bavard met with America’s favorite TV dad/heavy metal singer, Ozzy Osbourne, at a posh café in Hollywood. They discuss Ozzy’s hit MTV show, Ozzfest, his solo recording career and days with Black Sabbath, and the impending death that one day awaits us all.

Le Nouveau New Thing – “Reviews” of new releases – Fiction

August 2, 2002

World famous critic By Jean-Paul Bavard reviews Blink 41’s More Songs About Teenagers With Disposable Incomes, Andrew W.K.’s Party Party Party Party Party Party, Puddle of Nickelsmack, Staindback Park, and CBS Evening News With Dan Rather.

The Night I Died – BANG BANG BANG – Chapter three – Fiction

August 2, 2002

Above me, more mess in the sky. Like four or five copters and lights flashing around. And then, and then, all that flash replaced by different flash, I guess studio flash ’cause I’m at the studio. Those dumb lights that move and shake. These fancy cars and important people…

Some Catnip from Burroughs’ Cat – Fiction

April 19, 2002

I just got the package… my cat is going fucking nuts! He’s just pushin’ it all around the apartment with his nose – Ming! Stop that! – what in hell…? I don’t know what you put in it, but thank you, and – Ming! Uh, I gotta go… I’ll call you back.

The Turkish Baths, Cabana 12 – Fiction

April 19, 2002

When my friend Cindy suggested we go to the Turkish baths, I thought it must be some sort of historical, living museum-type place. But you don’t get naked in museums. At least, not the last I checked.

The Night I Died – BANG BANG BANG, Chapter Two – Fiction

April 19, 2002

Everything she’s saying is true. So true it’s fire, and I’m almost gonna explode, like blue ice shattering… “I’ll show you. I’ll show you, Jack. I’ve been holding it inside, trying to control it, but now I see I was just waiting, just waiting Jack…” I’m screaming.

The Future of Criticism – “Reviews” by Jean-Paul Bavard – Fiction

April 19, 2002

Mon dieu, it is so very simple yet so very true! Every work of art ever created by man can be explained to its very deepest essence by quoting lyrics from Barry Manilow songs.

The Unbearable Likeness of Michael Jackson – An “interview” with Michael Jackson – Fiction

April 19, 2002

Michael Jackson recently granted an interview to the Internationally Renowned Rock/Film/Fashion Critic, Jean-Paul Bavard. Meeting at Neverland Ranch, they discussed Jackson’s record-shattering career, his new album, his musical influences, and the wild rumors that have dogged his personal life.