Heroes Jargon – Column

Heroes Jargon

by Bob Butman

Well, as you can see, our winter hibernation has finally come to an end. It’s good to be back, though you probably never realized that we were gone for almost two months. Procrastination is definitely one of my strong points, considering the fact that we’re going to press in about two hours and I’m still typing. But as a wise man once said, necessity is the mother of invention, so let us wallow in the graphic novellas that give us life (or how about some great comics that make us smile). The new year has brought to us some promising new books, big changes in some old ones, and some small companies breaking for the big time.

Normally, I force myself into vomiting on the likes of D.C. first, but it’s a new year and “I’m feeling a little anxious, if you know what I mean.” So to show off my complete diversity, we’re going to vomit on something else. So how about rounding up an entire set of the New Kids on The Block dolls, lie them down and shove a blunt object down your throat ’til ya puke on them. O.K., enough with bodily fluids, let’s get into some chewie stuff.

Malibu is on fire! The Ultraverse continues to evolve into one of the strongest lines in comics. With the addition of Barry Windsor-Smith and his creation, Rune, this line is force to be reckoned with, so start picking up extra copies because most of the local dealers weren’t expecting big sales and are under ordering.

This year starts the Ultraverse out in a nice, well, Universal sense. With several crossover appearances in the works, this Malibu line shows maturity and intelligence by showing good character transitions and stories that you just can’t put down! By the way, I’m still trying to decide which of the Ultraverse titles to review. It’s tough.

Also out from Malibu’s never-ending well of creation is their newest weapon against the big money companies. The line is entitled Bravura and the first appearing character comes from the literary genius who brought us the likes of Warlock, Dreadstar, and The Infinity Gauntlet, Jim Starlin. His new masterpiece is entitled Breed and it immediately caught my eye with its cover all black, with the exception of a red, blood-drenched blade. (I should get a copy over to that Coroner’s Corner guy.) The bold cover was the perfect lead into a story that makes you want to rough up the counter help for the next one. Along with Breed, the original line up will include the comeback of Starlin’s Dreadstar (I’m so happy), Edge by Steven D. Grant, Power & Glory by Howard Chaykin, and Star Slammers by Walter Simonson (you know, the guy who gave Thor a beard). I predict that with this new line, Malibu is going to take a big chunk of the market away from Marvel and Image. Since the loss of publishing Image, they’ve proven that they’re a company with modern thinking and direction. They’re all the better off without Xtreme Studios.

Alright, now we can throw up on D.C.. I’ll be quick about it, don’t worry. After reading Superboy #2, I totally cracked up. It was so pointless that the next time I’m desperate to read, I WON’T! On to more positive things. Robin‘s series is reading smoothly as Boy Wonder teams up with the Spoiler to stop the Clue Master, only he ends up in over his head. Catwoman‘s new series just seems to crawl onto a chair for a nice little nap. Hopefully Selina will get a fresh bowl of milk before people start to lose interest in one of the sexyist looking characters this side of Chaos’s Lady Death. D.C. continues its revamping on all its major characters including Hal Jordan, the Green Lantern, and his quest for power along with the dramatic changes in Guy Gardner and his new persona, the Warrior. Vertigo‘s two part plus annual tie-ins rage on. It remains a superb story on its own and also let’s you enjoy the over all story with the rest of the Vertigo line. The Children’s Crusade is priced at $3.95 which seems a little high, but this piece is 60 pages of everything you’ve come to expect from Vertigo and more.

Valiant is making lots of happy faces with the new solo story of the Ninjak. I have to admit I’m one of those faces. Ninjak is definitely cool and having Joe Quesada on the pencils makes this book impossible to pass by. As I mentioned last time, the Shadowman #0 was on it’s way, well it’s here and just like XOmanowar #0. It’s $3.50 and very shiny and yeah, it’s worth it.

Now here’s something I never thought I’d have to say, especially since I’ve never said anything bad about him before; Turok you’re starting to be good for insomniacs. Someone wake me when he does something interesting.

I suppose I have to comment on Image, so here goes. Spawn is finally back on track (whatever that means) with an Anti-Spawn that really seams to enjoy kicking the s@#t out of him. He’s still hanging out with the homeless (anyone for a shot of Listerine?). The Killer Instinct crossover is the best thing Image has out. It’s a classic story of how girl manipulates boy, makes boy distrust friends resulting in boy being played as a chump. Of course, there more to it than that, but it’s great to see another guy get played the fool (not that that’s ever happened to me). This spot on Image is basically all I have since the Maxx and the Pitt are on vacation or something.

Marvel is once again last but not least. Well, they finally did it. After dating for over twenty years, having had children in different future times and having gone through death and divorce, Marvel made Jean Grey an honest mutant. Well, I don’t know about honest, and I’m not so sure white was the appropriate color, but none the less, Cyclops and Marvel Girl are MARRIED. For an issue where the story is pretty much understood, I’ve got hand it to them; it was touching. Like a real wedding only better. It gave the writer and the reader time to open up the character’s emotions on a very real situation. You see all of your favorite mutants experiencing one of the oddest emotions for anyone: The tear of joy.

O.K., enough with the mushy stuff. This will bring you back to earth; Jamie Madrox of X-factor has the deadly mutant disease (AIDS) and dies despite the help of Haven. There, that should put you in a better mood. Gambit‘s own mini series seemed quite enjoyable while peering into the cajun thief’s past. Of course, Rogue was right alongside her man. Now I don’t know about you, but I’ve just about had it with the teasing that’s going on between Rogue and Gambit. Will someone make them do it. I don’t even care if it kills one of them, it’s driving me crazy. I mean, I get anxious reading it (and I’m not even hard up).

Next time, Evil Ernie and Chaos Comics. Along with whatever else I want. See Ya.