Wizo

Uuaarrgh! (Fat)
by Scott Hefflon

Oooh! Fun punkpop in German! Now there’s a novelty. It makes singing along a little tough (unless you don’t mind hacking up phlegm and sounding really silly), but this fills that niché. In case you’ve ever had that empty feeling of “all the sappycore songs I love so much are in English” – well look no further, ’cause these ditties have those same head-swaying choruses filled with inane lyrics you can’t understand.

Upon closer inspection (well, opening the CD booklet), you’ll find translations and more umlauts than you’ve probably ever read in one sitting. Surprisingly, there are dark, humorous tales and anti-government tirades in these la-la-la lyrics. There’s a song about an unfortunate fellow who missed the pool from a 30 foot diving board, a coupla love songs, a coupla pissed off songs, and a slew of anti-government, anti-religion, anti-fascist songs.

The two closing tracks, “The Golden Piece (of shit)” and “Dog” are my favorites. The former is a beer-swilling bar’s bellowing, arms locked in inebriated solidarity chanting, “The golden piece of shit goes to you, and also to me…” And the latter is a glorious, Mexican-flavored sing-along about only-the-good-die-young, life-is-so-pointless, and gosh-you-just-never-know-huh? Bulging with horns, harmonies and happy feet, you’d never guess they’re singing about how we’re all going to die meaningless deaths. The profundity of calling life a dog and saying “It barks and bites, it eats and shits, and once in a while it humps your leg” has yet to hit me, but I eagerly await total enlightenment. In the meantime, I’ll be dancing.