L7

The Beauty Process: Triple Platinum
Skippy Rainey Reviews Bands with Letters and Numbers for Names
by Skippy Rainey

Okay, my older brother called me the other day and gave me some good advice: “You have to know something about a band before you review it.” I guess you do learn something new every day. Actually, I also learned today that fiberglass isn’t a good chew toy, so I guess I’m off the hook for tomorrow. So my brother came by today with two new CDs and a piece of paper with each called a “bio.” I was kinda worried ’cause I’ve never been good at science, but my brother said you only have to dissect small animals when you’re reviewing metal. My brother says not to tell anybody, but all the critics use them so they don’t have to come up with anything original to say. I figured now I’d be able to write music reviews as good as that Chester Banks guy, before he got all dead and stuff. I was so excited I knocked a glass of Sunny D. on them, and when I tried to dry them on the stove, I kinda burned a hole in them. I think I got all the information I need.

L7 The Beauty Process: Triple Platinum (Reprise) – Most people know L7 through their convolutions to the movies Nature Boy Killers and More Cereal, Mom, but they’ve been playing punt rock for years even though they’re just a bunch of girls. Their albums, Bricks are Heavy (well, duh) and Hungry for Sting, contain classic songs like… wait, this can’t be right. These girls wrote a song about making a list of every time they number two? That’s so gross! Girls do that? I heard about this women’s movement thing, but I didn’t… hey! Women’s movement! I get it! That’s three things today. I’m set for the week.