Columns/Fiction – Page 28 – Lollipop Magazine

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Coroner’s Corner – A Time to Kill? – Column

January 1, 1999

The plan was to provoke Alex to attack them so that they could kill him justifiably in defense. The premise is stupid as hell… but I love it.

Memory Holers – The Death and Death of Carlos Castaneda – Column

January 1, 1999

Even the nether corners of the Internet registered the news of Carlos Castaneda’s death like a great Dane lapping up an errant Cheerio from the linoleum.

Garbage Pail – The Atomic Cafe – Column

January 1, 1999

Relive those fabulous fifties in an atmosphere of fear, paranoia and good eatin’! The war may be cold but the food is piping hot!

The New Guy’s Not Working Out – Fiction

January 1, 1999

It wasn’t like Willis to compromise, but the new guy was persuasive. They agreed to salvage the “Love” sign by changing it to “Love Jesus or Burn in Hell!”

The Culture Bunker – Raise High the Security Gates, Carpenters – Fiction

January 1, 1999

While it was displaced from the cover story to the Letters section, cut from 26,000 words to 150, it was the most important article I’ve ever had published.

Rage Against the Cubicle – Fiction

January 1, 1999

Remember, it’s all about one upsmanship when you’re dealing with hipsters. When they’re ironic, you’ve got to be “ironic.”

Down on the Farm – Part III – Fiction

January 1, 1999

“He’ll be the only one,” he said. Then he let out a laugh that sounded like coarse-grain sandpaper against a steel door. “You know how to swim, don’t you?”

Underground Station – Column

January 1, 1999

Waiting for Food, is all restaurant placemat drawings, doodles created while Crumb waited for waiters.

Sarre-Chasm – Hello, I’m a Bitter Reactionary – Column

January 1, 1999

My favorite record released this year was Silky by Andre Williams, backed by two ex-Gories. Forgive Thee, The Cheater Slicks’ double record is a close second.

Fall Creepings – Everett Stillwell’s Holy War With Hollywood – Column

January 1, 1999

I was watching What Dreams May Come, which, like Blade, should have been fantastic but falls very, very short. This film made my ass fall asleep. Five times.

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