The Silent Whales of Lunar Sea (Noise)
by Chaz Thorndike
Ah, those punny metal bands with their clever titles and highly illegible logos… my but aren’t we progressive with that violin, those samples, and with more interludes, segues, and tangents than I care to go into. Yes, I’m impressed. No, I don’t like your band. Many tasty influences, time changes, and diverse flavoring can’t mask the powermetal aftertaste. Helloween stomped on yer ass almost a decade ago, but at least they knew they were silly. Oh, what the hell, buy it on sale, pump your fist in the air, march around your room, wave a lighter in the air, and snarl Dio’s “Look Out!” while looking all intense and shit. Enjoy!