The Third Eye
by Nicole Howard
illustration by RAchelle
I was trying to fall asleep when a voice inside my head that wasn’t mine interrupted me. There were three of them, but only one spoke. The voice belonged to a child-woman with long blonde hair and an elfin face, who resembled what I would look like in another realm. She told me that she and the other two were my Spirit Guides and that they were all equally in love with me. The other two never spoke directly to me, but through her. One was a dark-haired punk-ish guy that I would be busy trying to make myself attractive-enough-to-fuck in any other circumstance but the present. The third was a blurry image that was indistinguishable as male or female, but was no less important than the other two. I knew the only reason that I couldn’t see he or she was because my perception was not yet fully accustomed to this sight. I vaguely wondered if they could come into physical form, and since they were reading my thoughts they answered me by thinking thoughts back to me.
The punk guy said that he had been at the Middle East a couple of months ago when I was there. He had been leaning against the wall and I had stared at him. Now I remembered him because I kept on looking at him thinking that I knew him from somewhere. Now I knew from where. But all of this was transient, because they told me that I was the one who deciphered them into physical figures, since it was the only way that I could relate what they were to what I am.
They were here because we had all planned it this way while in the In-between. I had told them to face my Now Girl (Nicole) at this point in her life with an ultimatum, no matter where she might be. I did not remember telling them to do this, but I had not completely forgotten it either. The Spirit Guides told me that if I chose it, I would be in a serious car accident the very next day and probably lose my left leg. I would suffer to become a more complete person, who would possess supernatural powers; and later heal people. If I chose to keep my leg, then I would hold the same powers in a much smaller quantity.
I told them that my leg could not leave because I had to dance through life. And since I not only said it, but felt it and thought it, they believed my word and it clinched a bargain. I did not know I could control fate in this way and I knew not if I had taken or lost. I believed myself to be selfish and vain, but there was an assurance that neither answer was right or wrong, for each would bring the same results in the end; good and bad. The Spirit Guides did not leave, because they were always there, they simply grew quiet and faded.
But the encounter had opened up another set of eyes that I had been previously unaware of. My new sight could have been the beginning of the “special gift” that the Spirits claimed would be left to me, or simply an opening left from my contact with beings of light. That night, staring at myself in the mirror, the yellow-white figure of my spirit lapped back at me. I had obtained a juxtaposition sight of spirit images.
The next day, aside from nearly getting into a car crash, I lost my gloves. This was highly symbolic, because from that point on my hands raked over people with untouched sight. My body was charged with a ferocious well of energy that ran up and down, then over, my skeleton of bones.
I would see people as either their physical form or spirit, depending on which they were more possessed of. Spirit images were indescribably brilliant; we have no words to describe them. They were things of great beauty that made me start and feel like a gasp. Some people appeared as a color so distinct, that it was simply their own color. And in it I could look for hours seeing far more of that person than what they showed those who knew them well.
People give away almost all of their primary intentions through their presence. Anyone with bad-will towards me would cause my head to throb rapidly in the center. I almost fainted in the bank from an old man standing behind me in line who wanted to capture me in his black. I knew only that he had done many bad things in his life-time and would do many more.
It was bad to get stuck on any one person for too long, whether they had positive or negative energy. I learned not to look too much. When I was not careful, I would begin to feel “light-thoughts” crowd in and fill up my head, until I was sure that I would burst that person, or myself. The images I was seeing were so powerful that they could travel themselves to the person I was focusing on, if they thought of me.
This would cause thoughts to appear as pictures floating around the walls of whatever room I was in. It even happened at work in the bathroom, where images appeared on the walls as if a movie projector was running. Only there was no projector, there was only me. My apartment was a confusing place. Thoughts would grab any available free space they could to show themselves on. All of the walls were covered with pictures and a challenging mish-mash of thoughts lay amongst one-another in a pile on the linoleum floor. I never knew if they were my thoughts, or thoughts that people were having of me. Now I think that they are a combination of both, although I’m not really sure.
I’m not really sure what happened to me that night with the Spirits. I made a choice and I am living with the consequences. Of all the weird things that have happened, I only know that many more shall.
There are things we can’t speak about for fear that we’ll be thought insane. I told my parents too much and I got the feeling that they would’ve tried to commit me if I wasn’t over 18. It’s not like I’m saying that I think I’m Jesus or something, I’m just saying that I am this girl and there are these things that are happening and I thought the world should know.
I focus on nothing and everything, I pat my left leg. It’s still there, I’m still here.