Foo Fighters

The Colour and the Shape (Capitol)
An interview with bassist Nate Mendel
by Nik Rainey

Agent Fynch: Attached is my completed report on the latest stage of my undercover investigation into possible clandestine extraterrestrial activities by “rock ‘n’ roll” musical groups. As you know, I have for several months now been working incognito as a “rock journalist” (oxymoron of oxymorons, eh?) for a sub-literate monthly periodical, an almost absurdly simple undertaking which requires only that I submit several music reviews and articles larded with ridiculous youth-oriented “buzzwords” (cr: Document #7865-C, “When `Bad’ Actually Means `Good’ and Other `Solid’ Phrases”) every month and renounce all standards of personal hygiene. At the request of the director of the FIB, I have begun the preliminary stages of inquiry re: Foo Fighters, a band that has flaunted its connections to the alien community (by naming the band after our archaic term for UFOs, their label after the city where interstellar creatures landed in 1948, and their lead singer after Dav-grohl, the name of the solar system from whence came the creatures that introduced the unearthly fiber, flannel, to us that same year) most brazenly over the past two years, and yet has thwarted all efforts to stop them. Elusive as ever, my attempts to secure a “phoner” with either Dav(e)-grohl himself or his nearest associate, known by the nom-de-guerre “Pat Smear” (and allegedly responsible for the spread of mutant germs around the Southwestern sector of our nation in an attempt to affect the decline of Western civilization, if the information given me by a “colleague” has any validity), were deflected by the band’s management, using the time-honored method of coersion known as METTTBP (“Make ‘Em Talk To The Bass Player”). However, although said musician, one Nate Mendel, has until now escaped the scrutiny of authorities in either the federal or the publishing communities, I was able to ascertain certain hidden information in the course of a twenty-minute “overseas” interview that may aid us in our attempts to uncover, expose, then cover up the galactic menace that walks among us carrying guitars and self-produced techno remixes.
What follows is the text of my conversation with N. Mendel, with my annotations inserted at appropriate junctures (bold text – me; plain text – him):

Where are you calling from today?
Amsterdam. And before that we were in England, then Austria, then Hungary.
(I immediately begin my attempt to triangulate the signal to divine Mendel’s actual location, covering it up with inane small talk.)

Big Foo Fighters crowd in Hungary, is there?
We actually headlined the festival there. It was great… wait, there’s somebody at my door… can I call you right back?
(Wily bass-thumping bastard.)

Uh, sure… (click, beep) …Amsterdam right now?
Yeah, we’ve got a day off. Just taking care of business – doing laundry, writing postcards, romantic things like that.
(I suspect this is code: “doing laundry” meaning whitewashing all evidence of their otherworldly dealings, “writing postcards” meaning communicating with alien lifeforms using sophisticated radio equipment. Very clever, Mendel, very clever.)

What’s the typical European festival crowd like?
A sea of people, all grimy and half-drunk and probably hung over from the Ecstasy they took the night before. But they’re die-hards, you know? I mean, the festival season over here is a phenomenon that’s totally unique to Europe – there’s nothing like it in the US. They pitch their tents for the weekend – nobody stays in a hotel or anything – and just get crazy and fanatical about the music.

Are US crowds just too cool for that?
I don’t know. I just don’t think they’d spend the night in the mud to see a whole bunch of bands. I haven’t seen a whole lot of festivals in the US, but I notice that even the headliners will see a lot of people walking out on them after a day of music, and that doesn’t happen at all over here. The Prodigy are headlining a lot of these festivals, and everyone is there until the very end, rocking pretty seriously. That’s the Prodigy, too, but I’m sure that’d be happening no matter who it is.
(I advise a thorough investigation into this “Prodigy” – word has it that they have publicly admitted to arson and domestic abuse in the lyrics of their “songs” and are guilty of violations of the Hazardous Hairstyle Act of 1977.)

Did I hear right that you’re going to be opening several dates on the new Stones tour?
(“Stones, Rolling: alleged English band known for vampirically sucking the personality of popular bands in order to keep their aged, decrepit bodies alive, hence the phrase `you can’t get blood from a Stone.’ Carbon dating estimates the average age of the band members as over three hundred years old.” – Document #6780-C. pg. 17)
Yep, two of ’em, both in New York. We’ve had opportunities to play with a lot of really big bands before and I’ve always been ambivalent about it, but I’ve just recently taken a turn towards being affectionate towards the Stones. I saw some old footage of them from the sixties and Mick was such a crazy man, that I’ve got a new respect for them. So I’m looking forward to that.
Maybe you’ll get to hang out backstage, watch them adjust their trusses…
I bet we won’t even meet them, to tell you the truth. They’ll probably have big entourages around them, and they’ll probably have the fake Micks walking around… so I may get to meet the impostor, who knows?
(Hmmm… “Rolling Clones”? Interesting…)

Do they really have those?
No, I don’t know how that came into my mind. I know there was some band who used to do that. Maybe it was Queen – I hear so many Queen stories, Pat and Taylor (Hawkins, the new “drummer,” who played percussion behind Alanis Morrisette but is guilty of no other known crimes.) are such fanatics – they’d have fake Freddies (Queen lead singer, last name Mercury – ahem!) walking through the crowd while the real one slipped out the back or something.

With the teeth and all, to ensure the illusion was complete?
I’ll have to check with Pat on that.

I’ve heard rumors that the Stones have no idea what any of the bands they have opening for them even sound like. They just stand there with a bunch of darts and throw them at a copy of the CMJ tacked to the wall.
Oh, I’m sure. I really doubt Charlie Watts sat there and said, “yeah, this Foo Fighters band sounds pretty good, let’s take them.” I’m not even sure what angle they’re taking us from – we’re not such a huge band that we’re gonna help ticket sales, and I’m sure they’re not looking to cater to the youth market or anything. (Cater to, no. Eat the living flesh of, perhaps.) They’re their own institution. I’m a bit baffled.

What about the “corporate rock” angle? Are there any image problems stemming from the fact you’re on a major label playing relatively straightforward rock at this late date?
(Note my training kicking in with the mandatory “fanzine interview question” and the expected Pavlovian response.)
I don’t really have to justify the band or my position in the band too often, people aren’t really critical about it. People that bring the issue of “selling out” to this kind of music are kind of misdirected. You have to have something to sell out to start with. If we were against corporate involvement in music as a platform in the band and then we went and did like what we did yesterday, the Pepsi Budapest Rock Festival, then people should take us to task for that. But the band is primarily interested in making music, and we don’t even bother to worry about that. What’s happened in the nineties is that music has opened up to the point that anything that’s decent is going to be picked up and listened to, regardless of whether it’s in an undesirable genre. I really think that bands like Nirvana (reference unknown – will consult Washington) really opened the door for any kind of music to reach people. The point I’m getting at, of course, is that you don’t have to bend in order to be accessible to people these days.

True, but don’t you think Nirvana brought an end to the era in a sense, that after them, nobody’s received such massive, unified acceptance? (I have no idea what I’m talking about here – perhaps my training was too successful.)
Yeah, but I think that it just has to do with Nirvana being both a great band and a changing of the guard, as far as people’s attitudes toward music as fans and a change in the record industry as well. It’ll take another few years for another of those combinations to take hold, but I’m sure it’ll happen. The type of music that we’re playing isn’t as exciting to people as it was a few years ago. We’re not doing anything radically different. I think the album is good, and everybody seems to agree with that, but it’s nothing you’re gonna get fired up about necessarily. You have to live with it a while and let it get into your system.
(Good lord! I advise you put our viral experts to work on this immediately.)

Have you got anything going on outside the band?
In my spare moments, I’m working on a new record with my former band, Sunny Day Real Estate, which was a total fluke.

With William (Goldsmith, drummer for SDRE who left Foo Fighters under mysterious circumstances – perhaps he knew too much) too?
Yeah.

Was that awkward at all?
A little bit. It was tough on all of us – it was messy, and there’s just no positive way to look at it, except that we’re in a good place now, we have a good drummer and things are going smoothly at the band level and I’m happy that I get to play with William still. (Monitoring him, I suspect.)

What have you been listening to lately?
Oh, by far the new Radiohead. I think that that album is just far, far better than anything else that’s come out lately. They’re just working on a whole different level. (I demand an immediate inquiry into this “Radiohead,” as I expect you will find that this entire matter leads back to them. The evidence I’ve gathered shows that a) every musician and critic I’ve spoken to has said exactly the same thing, and yet the general public acts as if said band does not exist, b) the “lyrics” to said band’s new “album” refer quite explicitly to alien abductions, and c), well, just look at the lead singer. Definitely not of this earth.) Other than that, there really hasn’t been anything new in my player for the last few months, other than my finally getting into Alice Cooper (Again, not exactly sure who she is). Pat turned me onto him – I’d never heard him before but it’s cool, this quirky old seventies rock. Pat says that he doesn’t listen to anything he wasn’t listening to at the age of fifteen. “My musical tastes were formed and ended there,” he says. That’s pretty much Pat. He’s an endearing kook.

Any final words? Advice for the kids?
The four food groups are a lie. I’ll just leave it at that.
(On that subversive note, the interview ended. Shortly afterwards, “Pat” departed the band, cleverly attempting to escape the Bureau’s attention by announcing it on a cable television channel, known as MTV, that is never viewed by anyone over the age of twelve or the cumulative IQ of half that. Band leader Dav(e)-grohl, who interestingly was not mentioned once during this conversation, has allegedly taken up with a fellow musician with no known ties to the alien community but has been apparently involved in attempted regicide (or “Farouk assault,” in the words of a colleague). Findings at this point are inconclusive; I request an increased per diem from the Bureau to continue my research into the hidden meaning of this band’s lyrics. Evidently, the lead singer has no desire to be someone’s monkey wrench, and I won’t rest until I find out who and why.)