Glampire

The Beginning of Terror (J-Bird)
by Chris Best

“Suck” does not even begin to describe what this CD does. From the agonizingly dull intro, “The Grey Light Of The Pre-Dawn,” to the closing track, “Finally Arrived,” Glampire achieve what was once thought unachievable: They make the Psychotica album sound good. Fuck Glampire, if you really want a good album, check out Tom Jones Live At Caesar’s Palace. On this 2-LP set, the Vegas Juggernaut blasts through such favorites as “Dance Of Love,” “Cabaret,” “Soul Man,” “Delilah,” “Bridge Over Troubled Waters,” “My Way,” a medley of his big hits, and a rock medley that rapes and burns “Johnny B. Goode,” “Boney Maronie,” and “Long Tall Sally.” At the end, nothing is left of mid-20th century popular music except for Tom Jones, sweat pouring from his brow as the screams of scantily-clad women hail the conquering Welsh barbarian. Now there’s a fucking album!