Rock the Foe Hammer (Solid State)
by Tim Den
This is totally going to be a Metallica rip-off. Perhaps an addition to “nü metal” because there’re lots of breakdowns (and hardcore stage struttings), but still “keepin’ it real” with the band name gang? You know you’ve seen too many of these bands when you can tell exactly what music they play before you even put the disc on (note to bands: Pay attention to your layout).
Waitaminute… “produced by Steve Austin?” As in Today Is The Day’s Steve Austin? That can’t be right… Well, fuck me in the ass and call me Richard Gere… This ain’t nothin’ close to cheesy metal! This is down’n’dirty New Mexico/wild West shoot-out music. The kind that’d blast out of a futuristic, neo-Western saloon on the edge of the Gobilaasan Desert in the year 3457 A.D. The kind of tobacco-chewin’, gum-bleedin’, tougher-than-dried-leather guitarwork and general self-destruction that only Steve Austin can provide. Fueled by anti-religion liquor (“When Reality Sinks In”) and bounty hunter coldness (“Wolf to Eat”), even Yul and the Magnificent Seven would rather lick a thousand boots than run into these guys in a dark brothel. Pillaging the villages of Neurosis (for power), Today Is The Day (for heaviness), and Unsane (for “who gives a fuck” and “I’ll cannibalize your mother without blinking an eye”), Warlord is an entity that deserves fear from all. Don’t let the smiling photos fool you, they’re laughing because they lured you into their lair with the “metal” band name and cover art… Now they will feast on you.
(PO Box 12698 Seattle, WA 98111)