Choreboy

Good Clean Fun… My Ass (Triple X)
by Scott Hefflon

Calling Choreboy “the ultimate punk rock party band gone mad” comes close to summarizing (or not, as the case may be) an all-over-the-place release like Good Clean Fun… My Ass. Core members are guitarist Chris Gates (Poison 13, Big Boys), guitarist/programmer Mat Mitchell (Skatenigs), and vocalist Phil Owen (Skatenigs). No drummer is credited, and I suspect from the sound it’s a drum machine. Either that or it’s an extremely precise drummer who doesn’t play the most novel rhythms, and likes to be produced to sound like a drum machine. Speaking of production, it appears main Butthole Surfer Gibby Haynes produced Good Clean Fun… with “the same manic vibe that he leant to the Reverend Horton Heat.” I think they mean “lent,” and don’t I wish it were as smoking as The Gospel Sounds of… Nope, Gibby’s knob-twiddling is as innovative as Al J.’s dry lick production of the Rev. Which is to say, it sounds OK, but it sure as shit ain’t no “Jesus Built My Hotrod,” baby. Gibby’s vocal snarl on the cover of the Germs’ “Manimal” sounds like an anthem rocker trying to sing scum rock and disguise the sad result with amateurish loops and delay effects.

The opening track, “We’re In It For The Money,” rips out of the speakers with an insistence similar to a doesn’t-know-the-meaning-of-no telemarketer. Guest vocalist Sean Neil (Contradicks) takes this high-octane melodic punk anthem over the top, misleading any and all into thinking they’re in for a speedfreak slampit of a catchy record. “The Walls Are Closing In” and “Out All Night” keep the tempo, but switch to angry, tough, riot-provoking bar punk, and then slow down to set the mid-tempo grit punk pace of the middle of the record. The cover of the Dicks’ “Dicks Hate Police” adds a nice old school flav, and the manic Minor Threat “Sob Story” mixed into “Alternative To What/Sob Story” is a pleasantly harsh yelping of the obvious. “Ain’t Dead Yet” is, actually, the kind of GG-ish throaty roadhouse rock worthy of Gibby’s name: simple “Tie Your Mother Down” guitar trudge and lyrics daring Death to come and get them, if he can.

The album closes with amphetamined roadburners. “Bury Me In Texas” leaps out atcha like a wild-eyed mugger, “Skinheads” follows close on its tail, ragging on the Mr. Clean-looking bad boys, and “Bust Your Ass” features shredding guitarists Mike Derks and Pete Lee (Gwar) and lives up to the antics of X-Cops (members of Gwar, duh) both musically and lyrically. The album closes (except for bonus tracks) with the Choreboy anthem “Rub You Raw.” Chanting their own name, littered with a parody of “I’m a skating, stagediving, non-conformist, shit-kickin’, take-no-shit-from-nobody punk, muthafucka” muthafuckas. Bonus track #69, “I’m Not Sorry,” contains the swaggering guitar of Terry Bones (U.K. Subs, Discharge, Ministry) and deserves to be the theme song of un-PC punks who prefer being assholes to listening to pop/punk on corporate radio stations. “Cashing In” follows (unlike in the track listing) with a pro-capitalist anthem so similar to Minor Threat style (not intent?) the irony is gorgeous. Closing is a cover of “Blood Stains,” the return to the ripping “I’m Not Sorry” style (sans “American Society” overtones), and the chorus of “Blood stains/speed kills/fast cars/cheap thrills/rich girls/fine wine/I lost my sense I lost control I lost my mind.”