Freeway

with Kiefer Sutherland, Reese Witherspoon, Brooke Shields, Dan Hedaya
Directed by Matthew Bright
(Republic, 1996)
by Chaz Thorndike

I shoulda known better than expect much from a delinquent white trash “Little Red Riding (through the) Hood” satire. Starring ex-crazed vampire Kiefer (sure, he was a bad ass teen idol in The Lost Boys and a twisted scientist pushing ethical limits in Flatliners, but Mr. Sutherland is starting to look extremely comfortable in sport coats and turtlenecks, if ya know what I’m saying), a fully-clothed and self-righteous yuppie bitch Brooke, a furry-eyebrowed doofus cop played by Dan Hedaya (was Peter Falk busy or something?), and a little fireball named Reese Witherspoon. Luckily, all the characters introduced in the first 15 minutes are hauled off to jail, shot dead, or stranded in supporting actor limbo. No loss there. Reese begins hitchhiking to Grandma’s house, taking a ride from concerned motorist Kiefer. He turns out (oh such subtle allusion!) to be the Freeway Killer all over the news. He’s your typical highly educated crusader on a dark mission to rid the world of human trash. Truthfully, the I’m-a-guidance-counselor-and-you-can-talk-to-me scenes are rather touching, but always mildly icky ’cause you, the viewer, had long ago made the leap that Kiefer was a killer. When his sadistic side surfaces, Reese shoots him a bunch of times. Then she throws up. Reese’s character (the character’s name completely failed to leave an impression) proves to be both ingenious and tough as shit, never submitting to “the power,” and fighting back against any odds to keep her dignity. “They” call her unremorseful, but she proves to be the only honest, self-strengthened banana in the bunch. The cops’ looks of childish wonder as she spins her tale of childhood delinquency are un-jadedly cool, as is some of Reese’s dialogue and acting. But not even a few edge-of-your-seat action/adventure tunes and sonic trinketry by Danny Elfman can save this clunker. Reese Witherspoon is one succulent little ball of spite and anger, I just wished she’d offed more characters before they had a chance to talk.