Night Ranger – Seven – Review

Night Ranger

Seven (CMC)
by Scott Hefflon

Look, we were young, OK? Night Ranger‘s debut, Dawn Patrol, caught us at a time (early ’80s) when, like, Pat Benatar, Foreigner, and Journey were called rock. Jack Blades had (and still has) a voice about as “rockin'” as Don Dokken (who hit the scene at about the same time), which is to say, like some limp-wristed acoustic-guitar-strumming loser who wants your pocket change. In olden days, Jack would be called a balladeer. The fact that he’s in a “rock” band is a sure sign that the general public likes pop music more than gritty rock, despite the fact that it goes flat much more quickly. Blades is guilty of being in Damn Yankees (a band gun-toting Ted Nugent should be horrified he was ever affiliated with, but for some reason isn’t – I consider them as empty as cash-cow radio-pests like the Spin Doctors and Mr. Big, culminating in the unrockness of one-hit wonders like Third Eye Blind) as well as the Damn Yankees spin-off, Shaw*Blades, also with Tommy Shaw, yet another not-very-rock pretty-voiced pansy-boy who couldn’t get a job after Styx realized Kilroy Was Here may’ve sold at the time, but no long-time fan would ever respect them again.

And while guitarist Brad Gillis and Jeff Watson are both soloing up a storm here, you can’t help but wonder if they aren’t both wishing Jack would shut the fuck up and let them rip shit up. Gillis played in Ozzy’s band for a while and played on the live Speak of the Devil album. It’s doubtful he’s ever going to brush greatness like that again. “Don’t Tell Me You Love Me” and “(You Can Still) Rock in America” are a far cry from this platter of pastries, and even those only had killer solos in otherwise kinda fluffy songs we liked cuz at least they were more rockin’ than the new wave synth stuff that was popular at the time. So be careful what you’re nostalgic about, kids, cuz someday you may be quoted as having gotten the warm-fuzzies over such stupidity as “hits” from Seven like “Sea of Love,” “Peace Sign,” ballady crap like “Don’t Ask Me Why,” or “rebellious rockers” like “Sign of the Times” the way I’m supposed to remember low moments in rock history like “Sister Christian” and “When You Close Your Eyes” without retching.
(5226 Greens Dairy Rd Raleigh, NC 27616)