The Poop Report
by Chad Van Wagner
I love the Internet. Where else can you find something devoted entirely to the worship of poop?
No, this isn’t a scat porn site. This is simply a site devoted to the act of bowel evacuation. Whether it be etiquette concerning pooping in public places, or one of the many “Stories About Poop,” down to the user commentary, this place is all about the straight shit (hey, don’t give me that look. Do you know how many shit jokes I could have made, but didn’t? Consider yourself lucky.)
What’s particularly odd about The Poop Report is that after reading for a while, the snickers fall away, giving into something more… well, not more profound, exactly, but more substantial. There really does seem to be some kind of deeper philosophy for some of these people. Whether you think that makes them open-minded, or just plain nutty (Ha! Another one!) is up to you, but it is fascinating, in a third grade kind of way. And for god’s sake, be careful if you decide to get into the occasionally lively debates concerning topics such as whether or not it’s acceptable for parents to regularly wipe their eight year old daughter. These people aren’t always kidding.
Failing that, there’re poop comics.