Heroes Jargon – Column

April 1, 1994

Turok finally woke me up! Both Turok 11 & 12 and XO Man O War 27 thru 29 were just what the doctor ordered to shake those winter blues.

Mac Finds Himself – Fiction

April 1, 1994

“The point is…” Disgust faltered and became Unsure. He then become Shocked and Confused. “Wow.” He breathed in Awe. “This is quite an identity crisis, Mac.”

Improbable Histories – Fiction

April 1, 1994

Madonna publicly masturbated in support of the jailed bands while Pete Townsend told Tipper to kiss his “skinny, white, British ass.”

Give or Take a Day – Fiction

April 1, 1994

Mister Markus rose on Friday… Thinking it was Saturday… Went about his daily doings… Undisturbed, without delay…

A Band Called Me – Fiction

April 1, 1994

Like I, Me in the Key of E is an album whose primary message is one of self affirmation, particularly if the self happens to be lead guitarist Hans Onanson.

Coroner’s Corner – Column

April 1, 1994

A female onlooker is splattered by gore and must take a gratuitous nude bath to wash it off. The water turns to acid and broils her, screaming, to the bone.

Soliloquy – Fiction

February 1, 1994

You could walk like a ballerina, love like a Roman, steal like a cat, and philosophize like a guru.

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