Lollipop Magazine

Lexicon – 9 – Review

April 1, 1999

With precious little irony or snideness to distance himself from the enormity of his sins, Richards bravely stares right into the rouged face of the abyss.

Yip – 29 – Review

April 1, 1999

A 12-page bimonthly overseen by someone named Milky Puppy continues on its quest to mercilessly mock and belittle all things that normal people hold sacred.

John Hughes – Interview

April 1, 1999

An interview with John Hughes

Infiltration – #10 – #11 – Review

April 1, 1999

A quarterly devised by one Ninjalicious (an obvious alias – his real name is Ninjatastic) to chronicle the criminal activities of young “Canadians.”

Garbage Pail – Things That Disturb Me – Column

January 1, 1999

My growing suspicion that the letters in Penthouse Forum are real, but the ones I’ve been getting from my mother aren’t.

Garbage Pail – The Atomic Cafe – Column

January 1, 1999

Relive those fabulous fifties in an atmosphere of fear, paranoia and good eatin’! The war may be cold but the food is piping hot!

The Culture Bunker – Raise High the Security Gates, Carpenters – Fiction

January 1, 1999

While it was displaced from the cover story to the Letters section, cut from 26,000 words to 150, it was the most important article I’ve ever had published.

The Culture Bunker – A Friendly Remainder – Fiction

November 1, 1998

The ‘Bama Sutra: Showing in sadly explicit detail hundreds of different techniques and positions for having sex with blood relatives or the merely toothless.

The Big Lebowski – Review

November 1, 1998

With The Big Lebowski, Joel and Ethan Coen have finally made their geniushood official.

Garbage Pail – Scene & Herd – Column

November 1, 1998

The latest gossip, hearsay, conjecture, slander, calumny, fooferaw, unsubstantiated suppositions, and inoperative statements from the world of entertainment!

Garbage Pail – Five Great Films Involving Cheese – Column

November 1, 1998

The Guns of Provolone. The Hunt For Red Leicester.

Translations: I was lost in translation, but now I’m found – Fiction

November 1, 1998

After being translated into French, back into English, into Portugese, and back again into English: “For effleure external of the adventure, I will admit…”

Anne & Lenny – Column

November 1, 1998

Hey, look, a lesbian and I’m neither amused, horrified, nor strangely aroused! That’s her secret appeal, you see, the cute-but-not-too-cute Sapphist.

In Search of the Point – The Mind is a Terrible Thing to use as Paste – Fiction

September 1, 1998

“Since most people’s imaginations are confined to their own heads, and mine seems to have a radius of approximately 20 feet, I guess I can live with that.”

Scream 2 – Review

September 1, 1998

“An encyclopedic knowledge of premium-cable history and the ability to make up new slang words simply aren’t enough to maintain success in Hollywood anymore.”

L.A. Confidential – Review

September 1, 1998

One of the most intricate plots in recent movie memory (which I won’t even try to recount here), and like any good film noir, it’s thick with atmosphere.

Boogie Nights – Review

September 1, 1998

Boogie Nights is, on the whole, an assiduously ardent portrayal of the rise to prominence and penetration into the mainstream of pornographic film in the 1970s.

This is Orson Wells – Review

September 1, 1998

To many, Orson Welles is best known for three things: War of the Worlds, Citizen Kane, and as a (barely) walking fat joke during the last few years of his life.

In Search of the Point – Part Two: Zentropy and the Art of Pearly Gate Crashing – Fiction

April 1, 1998

“What’s going on, Fejod?” He asked the top of Fejod’s head. It was a dumb question, but it would’ve been dumber if he’s asked someone named Bill the question.

The Game – Review

April 1, 1998

A subgenre of films has popped up recently, trading on our knowledge of movie conventions and genre clichés, but even that subgenre’s starting to grow stale.

The Culture Bunker – Vanity, Thy Name is Lucre – Fiction

April 1, 1998

This feature comes to us from Merkin Aimless, noted second-generation British satirical novelist and author of The Lode of Auld Wanque and Spent Advances.

Garbage Pail – Things to do to John Denver When He’s Dead – Column

March 1, 1998

#4. Use him as an exhibit in the newly-constructed Folksinging Pussies Hall of Fame.

The Culture Bunker – 1998 in Review or Up Against the Wal-Mart, Maternal Fornicators! – Fiction

March 1, 1998

The year ends much as it began, with the minor addition of the bloody battle between the forces of good and evil on Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve 1999.

In Search Of The Point – Episode One: The Walls Have Ears, But No Q-Tips To Speak Of – Fiction

March 1, 1998

They realized they had been ostentatiously ubiquitous so they rendered each other an odd shade of curious orange and called it a day.

Scrawl – Review

March 1, 1998

A pleasing selection of interviewed artistes based not on genre or payola, but cuz they like ’em, whether it’s Diamanda Galás, Skeleton Key, or Ronnie Dawson.