Retrocrush – Review


by Chad Van Wagner

Y’know, I’m of the opinion that there aren’t nearly enough interviews with Randy Jones. Who is Randy Jones, you say? Why, he’s the Randy Jones, aka “The Cowboy” from the Village People.

Thank God for the good people at Retrocrush, then, for filling the Randy-shaped hole in the Internet. Among other things. Retrocrush is by and for the group known (unfortunately) as Gen Xers (which is a lot more polite than simply calling them “the next group of people to hit middle age”). Nothing but pop culture irony (?) served up with a big, aw shucks, attitude that makes browsing compulsory for us children of the ’80s.

It’s this careful balance between mockery and nostalgia that marks the site’s attitude. One article is about nothing but bad ’70s furniture, and while the comments are certainly on the smartass side (“If I was growing up in that house, I’d pretend I was living inside of Loni Anderson’s pubic hair” says one wag), there’s a strange sense of fondness for the bad taste so flagrantly on display. Hell, there are even pages on things you didn’t realize you remembered. Bee Gees lunchboxes? Rock ’em Sock ’em robots? Yup. There’s also the aforementioned Randy Jones interview, snuggling up against the Ron Jeremy interview (uh-oh) and the “Tom Cruise isn’t gay, really, he’s not” rant.

There is, as with many online magazines, a “babe” section. I dunno about a Meg Ryan gallery, but the fact that they somehow came up with a semi-nude of Winona Ryder that had eluded me up until now, well… that’s saying something.

When you’re, er, finished with that section, there’s a labyrinth of other stuff (both retro and otherwise) to delve into. If you feel like remembering what it was like to be eight again, this is the place to go. Right after you dig up that old Mattel Electronic Football game.