Mental Shrapnel: Genetic Splicings – Column

mentalshrapnellogo200Mental Shrapnel: Genetic Splicings

Lollipop has a long history of making fun of stupid people, stupid trends, over-hyped movies, TV shows, bands, and anything else we see.

There’s no end to the things you can make fun of if you can stop giggling long enough to scribble a one-liner on one of the shut-off notices lying around. That’s what they’re there for.

This column used to be called Garbage Pail. The title stunk, but the contents didn’t. It was a “catch all” for random weirdness scribbled on bar napkins and pizza boxes. It was also an excuse to commission illustrations that, let’s face it, would never exist otherwise.

Mental Shrapnel is a collection of the the weird mental connections you make and riff on with your friends and laugh until you pee.

Just cuz I wrote most of this, doesn’t mean you can’t email a Top Ten list, pitch sitcom plots we’ll never see, ponder what classic movies would’ve been like if Ashton Kutcher stared in them, whatever.

Do your friends think you’re a riot? Well, that’s why they’re your friends. Send in your brain farts anyway.

Captions by Scott Hefflon (just to get things started)
Illustration by Dave Dawson

Genetic Splicings


Peter Parker Posey
• George Michael Douglas
• Mr. Tom Greenjeans
• Flash Gordon Lightfoot
• Cat Stevens Seagal
• Chow Yun-Fat Boys
• Elton Jon Stewart
• Michael J. Foxworthy
• Andy Dick Clark Gable
• Larry the Cable Guy Pearce
• Dick Tracii Lords
• Andy Dick Patton
• Juliette Lewis Black
• Ashley Judd Nelson Mandela