by Chad Van Wagner
Who the Hell do you think you are?
That question was a pre-emptive strike. Because the Heidi in question at Heidi’s Dreamhouse will most likely prompt snorts of derision. Heidilynn, known to, uh, “his” mother as William Windsor, is a completely out AB (adult baby). He lives, eats, sleeps, and craps as an AB. When I say “craps,” I mean Windsor actually trained himself to become incontinent. For all the faux-rebellious bullshit that passes as “real” or “dangerous,” Heidilynn is the real deal. All you wannabe GG Allins can go pound sand: THIS is hardcore.
OK, I’m not here to review the person. Heidi’s site is kind of a weird blog/history/fanfiction hybrid that can really get under your skin if you’re not careful. There’s also advice on how to find your soulmate (“To ever have any hope of finding that one-in-a-million person who will change your stinky diapers, feed you your bottle, play with you, etc., you’ve got to have very deep pockets, so to speak”), and, naturally, a photo gallery. It’s all packaged with a “cute” pink background, just to drive the point home.
Maybe it’s the old fart trying to surface in me, but perusing this site tests my patience for the whole pierced/inked/modern primitive even further than it was before (which is saying something). Heidi does not do this to join a society, however “fringe” it may choose to define itself. “She” just IS, and the society forms around her. If you ever wanted to be made to feel like a poseur by a guy in his mid-’50s who wears a diaper, now’s your chance.