Lollipop Magazine

Garbage Pail – Movies Combinations – Column

September 1, 2000

Movies Combinations: Three Kings and a Baby, The Long Kiss Goodnight of the Living Dead, Father of the Bride of Frankenstein.

Garbage Pail – Family Reunions – Column

September 1, 2000

Family Reunions We’d Hate to See: Paul & Hulk Hogan. George & Hillary Clinton. Shaun & Neal Cassidy.

CD Reviews par Jean-Paul Bavard – Fiction

September 1, 2000

Britney Spears – Oops, I Did It Again (10 out of 10): An artistic triumph that ranks alongside the great masterworks of 20th century art, such as Van Gogh’s “Starry Night,” Welles’ “Citizen Kane,” and Ritter’s “Three’s Company.”

Garbage Pail – The Right Stuff – Column

June 1, 2000

NASA is also looking into applications of the new drug in reducing the tedium of space travel for their astronauts. The turds appear to be nonaddictive and have no known side effects but, because of their mild psychoactive properties, will be available only by prescription.

Garbage Pail – Names Changed to Protect the Cheesy – Column

June 1, 2000

What’s in a name change? For celebrities that’ve spent years trying to build up name recognition, there’s usually two reasons: Symbolically separating yourself from an embarrassing but lucrative past, or trying to give yourself a veneer of “I’m an adult thespian now” class.

Garbage Pail – Coming Distractions – Column

June 1, 2000

Hollywood’s self-referential, postmodern meta-madness hits its logical nadir in this parody of the Naked Gun movies. Leslie Nielsen plays Leslie Nielsen playing Frank Drebin, and, upon seeing a stuffed beaver, quips “oh, so this is supposed to be the part where I make some sort of sexual innuendo.”

C’est What? – An “Interview” with Limp Bizkit’s Fred Durst – Fiction

June 1, 2000

World-renowned Music/Theatre/Film/ Fashion/Media Critic Jean-Paul Bavard met recently with Fred Durst, front man of the multi-platinum superstar rap/metal group Limp Bizkit for an exclusive interview at Vacuity, a posh Hollywood bistro.

Garbage Pail – Pancakes of the World, Unite! – Fiction

April 1, 2000

I.D.O.P. (International Dungeon of Pancakes). I.I.O.P. (International Igloo of Pancakes). I.Z.O.P. (International Zoo of Pancakes),

Garbage Pail – Fangs Through Tofu – Fiction

April 1, 2000

Vlados, 247, died Tuesday due to complications related to his refusal to drink blood. Perhaps the most shocking convert to veganism ever, Vlados was converted to the cause by a couple of Birkenstock-wearing potential victims who showed him some persuasive pamphlets.

Bach-St Beuys – An “interview” with the Backstreet Boys – Fiction

January 1, 2000

World-renowned Music/Theatre/Film/Media Critic Jean-Paul Bavard met recently with the members of one of the world’s most popular singing groups: Billy, Timmy, B.J., Corey and Lester, better known as the Backstreet Boys.