Lollipop Magazine

Graffic Traffic – Ryk loses his war with the Marvel Empire – Column

November 1, 1995

In 1995, Marvel did it to us all, the whole comic company/distributor/retailer web. People lost their jobs and their dreams of self-employment.

Idle Chatter – Column

October 1, 1995

Here’s an update on the post-CBS whereabouts of The Kids in the Hall’s Kevin McDonald . He’s been spotted, in… uh… National Lampoon’s Senior Trip.

Mediacrity! – Column

October 1, 1995

The word has come down from the powers that be: There are no more stand-up comedians left to give to sitcoms to.

Prelude to a Lick – Column

October 1, 1995

People think I’m a mean, insensitive, anal-retentive, arrogant guy. Actually, I’m a misunderstood, sensitive, artist type, I’m just not usually drawn that way.

Idle Chatter – Column

September 1, 1995

Watch for CBS’ new reality-based newsmagazine, $48/Hr., which follows various second-string celebs as they couple with L.A. prostitutes in hopes of a comeback.

Coroner’s Corner – Species – Column

September 1, 1995

Shape-shifting, face-crushing, spine-ripping, etc. Don’t forget the great creature design by H.R. Giger (Alien). Several Natasha Henstridge nude scenes help.

Mediacrity! – Column

September 1, 1995

Note: After a unanimous vote last month, Congress has elected to cut off all of Mediacrity!’s federal funding and most of its hot water.

Prelude to a Lick – Assholes and Pussies – Column

July 1, 1995

The asshole/Editor is trying to make sure you live up to your commitment and not be such an irresponsible pussy. That’s right, I said pussy.

Mediacrity! – Column

July 1, 1995

The plight of the unsold pilot. As a public service, I give you several of the forgotten seedlings, lost in the unforgiving shuffle of TV Land, USA.

Idle Chatter – Column

June 1, 1995

An open audition for people to whoop, whistle, snort and pant for the laugh tracks of upcoming sitcoms, none of which have been produced or even conceived yet.