Lollipop Magazine

Garbage Pail – Just a Thought – Column

September 1, 1997

Ever wondered who this gender-nonspecific Webster person is who defines our language? And what of Roget? What do we really know about this Roget character?

The Culture Bunker – Welcome to the Messiah Complex – Fiction

July 1, 1997

We manufactured designer “accessories of Godliness” at the Sweatshop of Heavenly Piecework. These were rare and glorious times and I have the scabs to prove it.

Garbage Pail – Sample Questions from The Punker Aptitude Test – Column

June 1, 1997

If Bad Religion’s tour bus driving West at 69 mph, and collided with Def Leppard who were traveling East in a train going 92 mph, the resulting sound would be:

Garbage Pail – Scene Splicing – Column

June 1, 1997

Scene Splicing: Panterosmith. Sly and the Family Stone Temple Pilots. Ani DiFrankie Goes To Hollywood.

Garbage Pail – New Names for Ska Bands – Column

May 1, 1997

New CD from art-rapper MC Escher, Hiphoppohpih, recorded shortly before his tragic fall up the stairs of his Compton home after a drive-backwards shooting.

Garbage Pail – Rejected Taglines for Lollipop – Column

May 1, 1997

Rejected Taglines for Lollipop – Lollipop: Now With Adjectives! Lollipop: Now with copy editors that do their job good.

Garbage Pail – Communication Breakdance – Column

May 1, 1997

The latest news sample looping the scene is Isaidsomething Noisiboutem’s Blitzen’s lawsuit against Nihilism Sells’ Terrence Trent Razor.

Garbage Pail – Scene Splicing – Column

April 1, 1997

Scene Splicing: Four Non Blondies (“What’s Going On? Call Me.”). REM Speedwagon (“I Can’t Fight This Feeling, Kenneth”).

Garbage Pail – Column

April 1, 1997

Finally! A web site that goes soggy in milk! Links to the Vitamin B homepage! Helps you download more smoothly! And goes great with java!

Garbage Pail – Glossarock – Column

February 1, 1997

Glossarock: pot-rock – Phish, etc. skunk-rock – Bad pot-rock. runt-rock – Short guys with attitudes (eg. Danzig, Andy Williams).